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MY best of it.

1 Feb

I made a decision to temporary put myself on the first place. And adventure. And long forgotten hobbies (like photography). Not family, not bf, not work, not friends, not sports, not money, etc. This was easy, but what came out of this wasn’t, or isn’t to be more exact. When I first started to think about solo traveling in Thailand nobody took me for real, maybe they knew I was too tightened to life here and I was speaking gibberish. But face it, I don’t really have (for now) REAL responsibilities, except for my own happiness and how I manage that, through me and through others around me. I’m not blind, people around me have great impact on me and I have great impact on them, but too many times I was thinking about the consequences of this fact and made decisions under this influence. All I want now is to take some time, spend it with myself. I was asked some time ago which was my superpower. I thought that I needed time to figure this out, but I already knew what was it: just being myself and being able to let myself go in the same time. Sometimes I look like sleepwalking through my life and sometimes i am more sober and capable that i ever thought i could be. This situation is no exception.

People around me acted as if “it will pass”, “it’s just a phase she is going, she won’t really see it through”. But I did. I (tried) to explain my decision to people important to me, I talked to my boss, I bought plane tickets. Then, people RE-ACTED. Some reacted good, much better than I expected them to (parents, colleagues, boss-btw, thx a bunch, guys!), some re-acted bad and made me (not to rethink my leaving, as they would have wanted), but made me sad that they weren’t there for me, that I couldn’t share the excitement, that they couldn’t be glad for me and that they couldn’t see my decision as a sign of a REAL step in sobering myself.

Maybe it’s just me, but when you are in a relationship you don’t “breathe” only that relationship. You need to be able to breathe by and for yourself, as an individual, as a part of a whole, in order to be able to breathe inside the relationship. Why can’t we just be relaxed and feel at ease with the other’s way of being even if it is different than ours? Why can we accept that THIS brings people together much more than trying to sculpture the other as you want him to be..

I let myself once be influenced and the result was that I didn’t do what I felt like doing. Back then, I was thinking too much with my heart, ignoring what my guts and mind were saying.. I don’t really regret it in the mean way, but now, a couple of years later, I still think about that moment like of a lost train or bad inspiration and I wished then for myself that I wouldn’t do this again, that I will listen to my guts, heart and mind. IN THE SAME TIME, hopefully. Life doesn’t give us any guarantees, I realized that. we only take leaps of faith or make decisions that we must assume for ourselves. What ever this means. I have to always think ahead and live my life as I know best.

Even if I don’t leave now, this feeling won’t stop, I won’t be able to take some time for me and my staying here, now, isn’t/won’t be a guarantee of a future whatsoever anyway. I’m certain that in one way or another, my leaving like this will definitely mean a change for me of some sort. And for others impacted. I’m no fool. As I can change perspective, everybody can do the same. It will enrich me and I’ll definitely find more goods than bads in the end, and if less fortunate things happen, I’ll make sure that I’ll find the courage and power to congratulate myself because I went through this by making the best of it. MY best of it.

Please note that ..”Life begins at the end of your comfort zone” – Neale Donald Walsch

Photo source


Paris avec les filles!

23 Mar

Les ingredients clés pour une escapade magnifique à Paris:

  1. Paris au printemps
  2. 4 filles
  3. soirées mélomanes & dansantes
  4. photos
  5. mini-jupes & talons hauts /ballerines
  6. Paris la nuit
  7. promenades le long de la seine – champagne, chocolat, crepes
  8. nouveaux amis
  9. pique-niquer dans les parcs
  10. bonne humeur!!

PS:  J’ai trouvé quelques bons conseils sur – – génial!

Les actualités et commentaires à venir prochainement!

Grace Potter & The Nocturnals – Paris (Ooh La La)

Envie de paris

8 Mar

prochainement – Paris escapade avec les filles 🙂

Pics from Turkey part 2

2 Nov

Pic taken during paragliding, a few minutes from landing on the beach 🙂

selected pics from turkey

27 Oct

more to come

Selection from Switzerland #1

19 Apr

Finally, i’ve managed to find some time to select and post on my Deviantart gallery a couple of pics from the Switzerland holiday (Dec 09-January 2010). More to come soon, as the ice was broken now 🙂

Results: Luzern city, one of the most beautiful  and a great panorama from Sigriswil, looking like The Eye of Mordor from LOTR.

Gallery Switzerland #take 1 🙂

Deviantart gallery

sit back and really enjoy the ride

23 Mar

i don’t know what’s gone into me, but i’m dreaming with my eyes wide open to temporary move to Thailand for 3-4 months, depends on how long i’ll have the money. several events occured this past days and made me think of a “never ending holiday” in Thailand..

ever since i saw the movie “The Beach” back in 2000 i thought that that was indeed a place to live and i was overwhelmed by the beauty of the location! purely paradise on earth!

i never thought of myself as a person who will leave a big and active city (bucharest or another..) for a paradise like life in Thailand! maybe not forever, but my mind and body shivers only at the thought of this possibility and change in my life! i would want it to be like a initiatic life journey and an experimental way of life! sit back and really enjoy the ride and all the opportunities!

After experiencing Cuba and the Caribbean life, i purely and simply can declare that the rhythm of life colored my soul as nothing ever did! it was a feeling that i had even with two weeks before i left for Cuba. and the feeling stayed with me and never left me. this exact feeling i have with Thailand as if i already know this country and i eagerly want to come back there!

these days i discovered a blog of a Romanian living in Thailand and who is conducting his business from there. i really admire and envy his decision!  to leave Romania can be rather simple, but the backstage philosophy of leaving Romania for living and working in Thailand this is something remarkable, not to mention that work from over there has a new connotation!!

just imagine how it would be to answer emails and read the daily press from the porch of a beach bungalow overseeing the Gulf of Thailand! and to drink a cocktail laying in a hammock strapped between two palm trees!  not to mention the greatest parties ever – the world famous Full Moon Parties!!

i am rather set on the idea of spending at least one-2 months in Thailand this year or in the beginning of next year. If when i was in Cuba in 2006 it was easier from one point of view (not work involved, only academic stuff back then), if i’m going to leave for a period of time in Thailand, work here seems to be a critical undertake.

not hearing the rumor of the city, the anxiety of the people, the traditional traffic jams 24/7, the pessimistic voices, not seeing the grey of the buidings etc… but instead waking up and hearing the sea, the bluish water and sky, the gold sand, feeling and filling up with energy from all the parties…

I wonder how it is, for a change, to work from paradise 🙂 not a figure of speech for one’s company or employer 😀 , but really work from a place which represents so close my idea of paradise 🙂